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Did everyone feel like this after they got married? I hoped so. We lived in our new place together for eighteen months. Michael died. I won’t recount the scenes to wring tears: he died, he just died. The only thing I’ll say is that one of the last things he told me was, ‘when I get up there and they ask me what I liked best, I’ll tell them about you’. People use the word ‘void’. For me it was just the opposite. There was no void, I wasn’t empty. I was filled. I was filled with Michael, with anger, with despair. I was filled with loss. Michael’s death brought me to the second Great Unshakable Truth. I would never be loved like that again. Nobody could and nobody would. I never thought that thought but it was always with me. I’ve lived across the bridge for all these years and I’ve never come back until today. Ben thought I should and I know now that he was right. I’m living with Ben David, a structural engineer who’s brought calm to my life. The strange thing is that the calm comes. I will be your trainer." He smiled. He didn't kick me out. I guess that is good. She stood four foot-ten in her stocking feet, and had a slender build. "Chin up," he said. Anna raised her head. The chain leash rattled as he put the dog collar around her neck. He asked how she learned of the place. She told him. Jonathon said, "Then I assume you agree to be obedient and be used for the sexual desires of our visitors."The, "Yes," came with trepidation out of her throat. Her breath was short and her knees weak. "Where is your locker key?" She opened her fist and showed him the key. He took it off of her palm and snapped it onto the collar as if it were a dog tag"You are not allowed to stand up unless specifically told to do so. You are to remain on your knees at all times. You crawl on hands and knees, so get down." The site had told her the same thing. She did as she was told. She liked how her breasts looked bigger than when she was standing. She always did want to have breast.
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